gosh, the worst thing is that i kinda understand him. he really hasn't been home in five years and he has been stuck in fort wayne for almost two years now. the only times he's gotten outta there were when i was visiting. and if i'd come he would pay as much as for a vacation without going anywhere.. still -- I really don't care where i spend my vacation as long as i'm with him. and that might as well be the crappy apartment in fort wayne.. and i just wish he would have said something before. i mean, we talked about it and the last time was on friday. and at that time he even said that he wouldn't mind renting a car again and picking me up in chicago. so if he would have said right away what he was thinking about i wouldn't have looked into flights and gotten all super-excited over the weekend. and now i'm upset and disappointed..

well, i'm hoping now that i can at least get him to really come in august and no later. because then i can still get a week or so off and we might be able to go some place. so we'll see. ttyl ;o(